the perils of being a stay-at-home

1.  It’s 4:01 and I’m still in the sweatshirt and pants I slept in.  I would admit to not even brushing my teeth yet, but I won’t.

2.  Monster toddler turns off computer as I’m working on methods essay.

3.  Monster toddler climbs on the curtains as I attempt to hem them, breaking the last sewing machine needle I have.

4.  Monster toddler takes nap long enough for me read 3 blogs from aggregator (+/- 10 mins).

5. Monster toddler gleefully grabs and flings piles of laundry as I fold it.

6. Each trip to the kitchen finds me leaving with food (grapes, brownies, grasshoppers, pbf, left over chicken stew…I swear I’ve eaten lunch 4 times over today).

7. Lovely pre-schooler watches Land Before Time (#11 Invasion of the TinySauruses) a third time; he WOULD be better off a someone else’s house! If only the Monster toddler would take an interest in TV!

8. I start wishing for a 9-5 corporate gig that requires that I wear pantyhose, high heels and manicured fingernails; surely my self-worth would skyrocket by leaps and bounds.  Surely my conversations at the water cooler would be more stimulating than: "No!"  "Hot!"  "Don’t touch!"  "Yucky!"  "Uh-oh!"  "Yes, Kitty Cat.  Stinky kitty cat."

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4 thoughts on “the perils of being a stay-at-home

  1. Ummmm…you can find time to apply the toothpaste to your zits, but *not* to your teeth? (just kidding)

  2. Don’t bet on the improved water cooler talk. There’s no gossip like office gossip. So while the number of syllables employed may increase, the quality of the conversation probably wouldn’t.

    Speaking of hose, I just returned from mom’s house. Mom has graciously been storing about 13 boxes of my stuff. Among those items back in my posession? A dozen pair of Nordstrom’s finest pantyhose, strategically purchased two months before accepting a job at UW in which I stopped wearing skirts. Give them up, you say? Nonsense. Someday they might come in handy again.

  3. Trust me, you’d be begging to get out of the high heels etc after a couple of days. Sloth mode is something i aspire to whenever i am able…..i write and study better that way!

  4. No, no! You don’t know what you are asking for! You would then have to deal with mommy-hood plus looking nice, and meeting different schedules and deadlines! Oh, and still clean the house, set up doc appts, grocery shop and make dinner. You wouldn’t have an easier life…it would be twice as difficult! Basically, you do everything that a “S-At-H” does, and then your job. If you want stimulating conversation, there’s more to be had with your 8 year old than your coworkers! I have worked outside the home for the last 4 years (+or-) & I am looking forward to summer where for once I will see my daughter rather than drop her off at “camp”-mend curtains? Write essays? Who has the time when there’s an outside job?

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